dear world,

remember that song, anticipation? i think it was carly simon who sang it or maybe carol king. either way, it’s been rolling around in my head for a couple of days. friday morning will be the first time that i’ll be responsible for getting two kids up, fed and out of the house all by myself.

i know people do this every day. i actually know people who do this every day. however, i haven’t done it yet and am a little apprehensive. what if it all goes to hell? in my imagination, V will be pleasant as a spring day and listen when i ask her to do things. N will have eaten at just the right moment before V wakes up so i won’t have to worry about feeding her before we head out the door. V will love putting her coat on, will helpfully climb into her car seat by herself and it’ll be wonderful.

i am anticipating the opposite of this picture. i’m so sure N will want to eat right in the middle of getting V dressed which will get V al flustered and unhelpful. V hates wearing a coat and i’ll be lucky to get her out the door with two socks and two shoes. honestly, for a first attempt, if i get her out the door with most of her clothes on and not too many tears that will count as success for me.

what i didn’t realize until MHM mentioned it the other day is that on the days when both girls and i are alone together, i’m going to have to figure out a way to feed the baby and keep V safe at the same time. again, i know people do this, but i don’t know how and i haven’t tried it yet so i’m a little nervous. at least my body is starting to feel better so hopefully i’ll be able to catch her if she decides to do something really dangerous.

almost ready to do it on my own,



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